2.2.05

Impressions of Inadequacy

Today I learned that once a software program has been found lacking, little can sway users to stay with it, or come back once they leave. Quark is quickly displaced as a platform for design layout by InDesign. Why? Quark...well, has quirks.

I also learned that some people, once they’ve made up their minds about it, simply won’t be impressed by someone else. I fight the uphill battle to show what is true already: that some quality or other has moved my boss to offer me this job, empowering me to lead in an environment where leadership is undesired, often despised, and sometimes dismissed. While respect is not something given but earned, so respect is also given when it comes with authority and the assumption that benevolence and kindred desires will ultimately prove the wielder worthy of such respect. Some days, I believe that and simply think, “If I can just show G1 what jobs I’ve been able to do, how I’ve learned Quark, Photoshop, and brought back all my old AP style of writing (from college Journalism classes), then I’ll have proven myself worth of some portion of respect. But I’m a undesired platform, deemed unworthy. So I preserver, faithfully labor at the tasks before me, and trust that in time G1 will find within herself the desire to follow, if not for the sake of a man (or any man) but ultimately for the sake of God.

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